The days leading up to my last chemo session were tough for me. I should’ve been thrilled that I’d be walking into my chemo room for the very last time. I should’ve been so relieved. I should’ve felt on top of the world. At least that’s what everyone kept telling me.
I actually think the last treatment was one of the hardest ones. I tried to be happy about it, but honestly who’s ever happy about going to chemo? On top of that, I know that I still have to wait for my PET scan results before I can officially say I’m done. That final scan has been on my mind a lot lately and I’ve been so nervous/stressed about it. I’ve had nightmares that the results didn’t come back clean and it’s terrifying to even think about. Today, for the very first time, I woke up with a strong feeling that I’ll be ok, but last week I felt a lot less confident.
So what’s next?
My PET scan will be on Dec. 20th and WHEN (not if) all goes well, I’ll have a follow-up visit with my oncologist after that. I’m also hoping to get my port removed before I head back to Virginia, but we can’t schedule that until we get the scan results back. I’m a little worried that the holidays will make it difficult to schedule, but I’m determined to start the new year off completely free from anything that has to do with cancer, including getting rid of this medi-port.
What about my blog?
A lot of people have asked if I plan to continue updating the blog and the answer is YES! There are so many things that I want to write about still that I just didn’t have the energy for over the past 6-7 months. I also get asked a lot of the same questions on a regular basis so I want to address some of those publicly as well. For example, what’s an appropriate gift to get someone who has cancer, or what should I expect for my first chemo visit, or how do I pick out a wig for the first time? I’ve said this from the beginning and it’s still true- I really want to do whatever I can to help other people who are going through a similar situation. If you have a question that you’d like me to write about or even answer privately, please leave a comment or send me a message and I will do my best to help!
For now, I’m just focussed on my upcoming scan. I will update everyone with the results as soon as I know them. Any positive thoughts or prayers you can send my way are very appreciated!